How to Become Calm and Quiet ; 27 Tips to Slow Down
In a society driven by opinions, content, and advertisements, we rarely take the time to sit down and listen. Learning how to become calm and quiet can maintain balance when your life is loud and chaotic.
Why Does it Matter?
Being calm and quiet can help alleviate anxiety, boost interpersonal connections, and aid in everyday problem solving skills. Following these steps will give you an edge in the workplace, and prevent you from being a chronic worrier. According to Psychology Today, taking small steps to breathe and slow the mind will lower cortisol levels and make you a calmer all-around individual.
21 Ways to Become Calm and Quiet
In this post, we’ll explain why being cool is the new cool, and why quietness is real strength.
#1. Load up your car and watch a sunset
We can find beauty everywhere, in anything and in anyone. Grab a blanket, don’t forget something to drink and drive to your favorite spot to watch a sunset.
Something happens in us when nature is inspiring us. Things like joy, optimism and calm are natural addition to a life staying close to nature.
#2. Plant a plant
Plants teach us that life is a growing process. Learning to become and quiet is a lesson we can learn from plants as we grow through watching them grow.
#3. Adopt a furr baby, or a vintage t-shirt!
You do not have to adopt a furr baby to enjoy life through the strength of quiet. You can today adopt vintage clothing and breathe some new life into it!
#4. Do not settle for anything less than the person you want to be
You can become the person you’ve always wanted to be. Learning how to become calm and quiet is a reality you can believe yourself to become. Don’t hold your back!
#5. People watch
Observing others can help us see the flaws in ourselves. Study and watch people interact with one another, you may find being loud is not who you want to be.
#6. Your texts do not need 100% of your time, all the time
We are far too quick to respond these. Often, I’ll catch myself replying to someone before they’ve even fully asked me a question- which can lead to all kinds of chaos.
Be intentional about taking a couple of seconds to weigh what you’re going to say, or how you are going to answer. Ask yourself: Is it true? Is it helpful? Is it necessary? If the answer to all three questions is no, reconsider offering your opinion or advice.
Taking a second to think before you respond will not only make you seem calmer to others, it’ll also give you a moment to fully weigh your response before you give it.
#7. The opinion of others matters
So much more than we realize, we hear what people say without actually listening. The more you listen to what others say, the more you’ll learn that they are much more interesting than we might originally think!
Other people have a lot of expertise and knowledge to offer. Take the time to slow down and listen, really taking on board the information and experience that you can gain through conversation with friends and coworkers.
#8. Ask other people about their past, present and future
One of the best ways to make others feel heard (and make sure that you’re talking less in a conversation) is to ask them about themselves.
Build relationships, and teach yourself to be a better listener by asking more questions (and listening for the answer!)
Dale Carnegie’s book “How to Win Friends and Influence People” discusses the importance of asking others about themselves when you meet them, giving the impression of “interested interviewer” rather than “self-absorbed jerk.”
#9. Negative self-talk is not real talk
According to A Conscious Rethink, one of the worst things that a person can do in a first-impression conversation is to engage in negative self-talk.
Don’t bring down a conversation or negatively influence someone’s opinion of you before they even have a chance to form a real opinion! Speaking slowly, holding eye contact, and being confident will establish you as a calm and collected person in any setting.
#10. Take note of things and people that stress you out
Be conscious and take note of people that drain your mental energy. In college, I couldn’t figure out why I always felt exhausted after hanging out with a certain group of friends. After joining a bunch of clubs I saw them much less, and realized how much happier I was when they weren’t around!
Be intentional about who you share your energy with, and take note of who makes you a better, more confident person.
#11. Detach from stressful situations
Once you’ve taken note of the people and situations that stress you out, limit their influence in your life.
I’m sure by now you’ve heard the phrase “confidence is silent, insecurity is loud.” In your quest to become more zen, choosing to neglect stress things and people should be at the top of your to-do list.
Focus on self-healing, not self-promotion. If you do find that being anxious makes you over-talk, try and slow your breathing and focus on what matters: your mental well-being
The National Social Anxiety Center points out how helpful “mindful focus” can be in coming across as calm in a social setting, including regulating your breathing.
#13. Hobbies: The Teacher of Mindful Distraction
Hobbies that force you to slow down and focus are great examples of small changes you can make that could have a huge impact.
Something as simple as taking ten minutes out of your day to paint, do a crossword puzzle, or meditate, can distract your mind with the self-healing of quietness.
#14. Get your energy out
Much like a calming hobby can make a difference, hobbies that are high energy can be hugely helpful too!
Countless studies have shown the positive correlation between exercise and mental health, so the next time you have a spare half-hour, go for a run or lift weights to get rid of anxious, excess energy!
#15. Cut back on emails and texts
Having lines of communication open every moment can train your brain to always be looking for the next thing your boss needs you to do.
Having times in your day when everything is quiet can help you get used to quietness, and even learn to enjoy it!
#16. Cut back on social media (bye, twitter)
An article released by The Independent found that social media can affect our mental health negatively in a myriad of ways, including heightening a sense of anxiety or depression.
Cutting back on social media can help alleviate some of these feelings, and help center your mind on the present.
Engaging in a social media cleanse, or just having a couple of hours every day where you put your phone aside can help you escape the feeling of impending doom that your twitter feed can elicit.
#17. Write out what you really think in a journal
As simple as it may seem, writing your thoughts down is actually a great way to pause, slow down, and meditate on your feelings.
Re-reading the words you write down can help you process them in a different way, and the slower method of writing out what you want to say forces you to pause and consider your words.
This is a great habit for becoming a quieter individual as you practice the importance of phrasing and putting emotion into your language.
#18. Meditation teaches us the joy of quietness
Meditation doesn’t have to be like what you see on TV; it can be as simple as setting aside a couple of minutes every day to clear your mind and focus your breathing.
A friend of mine considers her morning coffee her meditation for the day because it’s the time that she sets aside to just sit and be for a few moments before her day gets crazy.
Do whatever relaxes you and be intentional about the time and space that you create for yourself to calm down and center yourself. I tried Thich Naht Hanh’s dish challenge and found I found to be enjoy the task purely from slowing down.
#19. Rest, we all need to
This one may seem obvious- but when is the last time you put aside an hour or two just to rest with no distractions?
So many of our “vacations” are filled with the need to go sightseeing and have fun activities planned- and while these are awesome things to do, it’s also important to protect your rest like you protect your work time!
#20. Make a “chill” playlist
Turn on some Lo-Fi beats or some Gregory Alan Isakov and let your mind just chill for a minute.
Having playlists that relax you going in the background can help center and soothe you even in the most anxious situations.
PsychCentral.com released a study that found that patients with anxiety were greatly helped by listening to music, lowering their symptoms and creating a feeling of calm- so throw on that “chill beats” pandora playlist next time you’re feeling a little stressed.
#21. Get back to nature
Getting away from the hustle and bustle of your everyday life to sit with some trees can be very helpful in getting your calm back.
Try going somewhere away from the noise of your daily life and sitting quietly in nature, listening to see what you can hear.
Meditating in nature or taking a walk in the woods can help ground you and give perspective on some of the things we spend too much time worrying about.
#22. Think soothing thoughts
The power of intentional thought is overlooked so much of the time, but it really can help us learn how to become calm and quiet. Be aware of where your thoughts go when they’re allowed to run wild, and then try and guide them to a more positive and soothing place.
Remind yourself of things that calm you down such as happy memories, or self-affirming mantras.
The more time you spend focusing your energy on self-encouragement, the less time you’ll have for needless rambling and anxious energy.
#23. Gratitude makes us the best version of ourselves
When you’re feeling overwhelmed, making a list of the things that are going right in your life can really help to ground you.
Ask yourself: what is something that I really wanted this time last year that I have now? Am I appropriately grateful for that thing? What am I taking for granted?
Taking stock of the things in your life that bring you joy will remind you that the thing that is stressing you out is actually probably not that high up on the list of things you should be focused on.
#24. Clean a dish the Thich Nhat Hanh Way
In the “Miracle of Mindfullness,” Buddhist Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh challenges us pay attention to each and every detail of washing a dish. It might sound basic, but the lesson in quietness is profound.
A house free of clutter is a mind free of clutter. When you’re feeling stressed or anxious, make sure that your surroundings are clean and tidy before trying to tackle any of your other tasks (unless they’re time-sensitive).
You won’t be able to focus if you’re surrounded by mess, so make sure your line of sight isn’t being taken up by trash and clutter and give yourself the space to work and tackle your tasks for the day!
#25. Set Routines
Setting routines can help make stressful tasks become second nature to you. Once the hardest part of your day becomes muscle memory, you’ll be able to focus your mind and energy on more productive things.
Have a set time that you go to sleep and wake up every day. The more organized you are, the more on top of things you will be!
#26. Give of Yourself
Volunteering your time can teach you that sometimes, it’s an incredible way to learn how to become calm and quiet.
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Tips and Reminders
If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed or talking far too much, these tips can be really effective in alleviating some of that stress. The calmer and quieter you are, the more time you’ll have to listen when others talk, and you’ll probably find that there are a lot of things in your life that you’ve been overlooking in your rush to be the first to speak or just survive your stressful days.
This list ultimately boils down to taking the time to be intentional throughout your day, listen to your body, and care for yourself as you would care for someone that matters to you. Prioritize your rest time, get rid of things that stress you out, and don’t let yourself talk endlessly without saying anything of any real substance. The more you apply these tips to your life, the less stressed out you will feel, and the more you’ll realize that being cool, calm, and collected is the best way to be.
These 27 Tips can truly help you become calm and quiet in 2020! When we power the power of calm and quiet, we find ourselves not having to be the best because we have inner-satisfaction.
Discussion question: How do you slow down? What are the tips you use to become calm and quiet?
To your wellness,
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